You idiot. No one wants to talk to you if you curse like that. Sweaty mother fucker
You know that was an extremely rude message you sent me? It doesn't offend me, of course, but you could be a bit more nice to me. It hurts my feelings sometimes and makes me feel hated. Oh and by the way I was gonna apologize for my mean message to you, but after what you sent me, I feel that I shouldn't take back what I said to you.
What in the Lord's name did you just say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in Ministry school, and I have over 300 confirmed conversions. I am trained in the Baptist religion and I'm the top missionary in the entire Christian world. You are nothing to me but another infidel. I will teach you the word of God with the largest gospel choir that has ever been seen, mark my words. You think you can get away with rejecting Christ? Think again, sinner. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of pastors and priests across the USA and you're going to be forced to accept Jesus as your lord and saviour, so you better prepare for your baptism, sir. The baptism that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call atheism. You're Christian soon, sir. I can teach you anywhere, anytime, and I can preach in over seven hundred languages, and that's just off the top of my head. Not only am I extensively trained in reciting the bible from memory, but I have access to the entire literature of the Archdiocese of the Americas and I will use it to its full extent to bring you into Christianity, you little atheist. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your heresy was about to bring down upon you, maybe you wouldn't have challenged the existence of God. But you couldn't, you didn't and now you're paying the price, you goddamned sinner. I will teach Christianity all over you and you will drown in it. You'll be a believer soon, kiddo.
Okay, so you expect me to believe that you were the very best that your generation of Navy SEALs had to offer? I highly doubt that. If you were as good as you say you were, i don't think for a second that you would be browsing 4chan. This is mostly a place for jobless neckbeards that still live with their parents, and nerdy high school kids that don't have any friends. It really isn't the place for highly-trained assassins to be hanging out in their spare time. Even if it was, something far worse than a troll being mean to you probably would have set you off a long time ago. What about the slew of gore and child pornography that gets posted here on a regular basis? Isn't that something that deserves a person being hunted down and made to regret their actions? Yeah, you're just not the 4chan type. Sure, there's a wide variety of people that browse here, but you're far from the core demographic if you are who you say you are (which isn't the case). Even if it were true that you're an incredibly talented soldier, I think all the military discipline would prevent you from getting mad enough to murder some random idiot on the internet. I also doubt that even the best SEALs have a "secret network of spies across the USA". Why would all of the most expanisive Big Brother network in the world be willing to help a troubled PTSD-sufferer hunt down some random kid on the internet? That doesn't even make sense. If you're gonna try to scare somebody, make it more believable than "IM A SUPER SOLDIER HURR DURR". You might frighten a thirteen year old who doesn't know any better, but to must of us you just look like a kid with an anger problem and a very active imagination. Hopefully things will be easier for you when your puberty's over. Best of luck with that... kiddo
What the iOS did you just say about Apple, you little Android ? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in business marketing, and I've been involved in numerous lawsuit investigations in Apple, and I have over 300 confirmed iPhone sales. I am trained in Phone warfare and I'm the top businessman in the entire US cell phone company business. You are nothing to me but just another jailbreaker. I will outsell you with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my words. You think you can get away with trying to jailbreak around me? Think again. As we speak I am contacting my secret Facetime network of geeks across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out your gigabytes and gives me all your money. Your tricks are mine, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can stop you from jailbreaking in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in selling iPhones, but I have access to the entire arsenal of Apple Products and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your entire monthly plan. If only you could have known what unholy retribution of trying to jailbreak and trying to download apps for free would bring you, maybe you would have not of jailbreaked at all. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over your malevolent goals and you will watch me with your bricked iPod as you're you and your shit music is taken away in a police van. I'm fucking rich, kiddo. Iciloo 19:26, August 19, 2015 (UTC)